I am not stuck in a pickle – Day 12

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Ok I haven’t heard from Him since Sunday.

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I chatted to Rick all day.

I am going on holiday with Him in a weeks time. I haven’t heard from him since Sunday. Honestly I’m a tad annoyed about that (yes I know I can pick up a phone and speak to him if I want) but after he has fed me so many mixed signals I am not particularly sure what to do anymore. He wooed Me! Seriously I was minding my own business and then we met and it was so magical and we both dove straight in and then he paused and paused as well. If we get down to the nitty gritty here, when he said he wasn’t ready for anything serious and wanted to keep it light and had a lot to figure out and said that when he was in New York he realised that I was a distraction and it only hit him when he was alone that he still had so much figuring out to do. If I am honest with myself, I should have left, but I didn’t want to, because he is incredible and I respect the place he is right now and I respect that he was honest. So I clinged to it because he is amazing.

Now I am falling for Rick and I have fallen for Him.

When?

When did this happen?

I’m the one that sits on the floor in the book store and reads and writes about her feelings. I’m the girl that is so self aware that its painful. I put love first, always. I am the girl that gives her friends advice about guys. I am the girl that i in the relationship always and is committed.

I am not the girl who is holding two different hands.

Had dinner and slept over at my two best friends and it was lovely and they assured me that I am not stuck in a pickle.

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