Today was better at work, I was more comfortable and I felt a little more in control. I was actually starting to get used to being there and get used to being home.
Last night I lay in bed and I couldn’t sleep, for a few hours I tossed and I turned. Worrying about the Kibbutz because I hadn’t heard back yet, the Kibbutz is my out at the moment. If the Kibbutz doesn’t happen then I don’t know what will. Worried about him because he has become so distant. Worried about my relationship with my boss.
I made the decision that tomorrow evening when I meet him for dinner, I am going to end our relationship. Is relationship even the right word? I don’t know.
Eating wise wasn’t great. I binged on ice cream in the afternoon. I went to the farm at about 17h00 to spend the night. We landed up having such a fun spontaneous night! Made pizza and pasta and had wine and then chocolate and then we even had liqueurs.
My mum, dad, my brother and me. My happy place, on the farm.