I am so scared.
The way I am falling in love with A.
Its exactly a year ago that my marriage fell apart. I remember it clearly because my dad was in Namibia at the time and he goes at the same time every year. He left this past Sunday.
All the feelings and emotions just came flooding back and have overwhelmed me.
Made me realise what a risk it was being with A, and starting this relationship and its brought all my fears to the surface. So many what ifs. So may doubts, a voice in my head telling me that it could all disappear in an instance. Telling me that it could be taken away from me.
And I am so horrified.
The feelings I have for him. How wonderful he is. How lucky I am.
I never want to lose what we have.