I know…

I know…

I only write when everything is just a total and utter fuck up…like it is now.

Let me break it down for y’all…

I broke up with A. Remember him, the sweetest most wonderful man to have crossed the planet? Well, this girl broke his heart.

And then what did I do?

What do you think I did, if you’ve been reading my blog for the past few years then you know me by now and yes I did it again. I found a man almost instantly and fell for him and I fell hard. An yes I know its unhealthy.

But tell me what you would do if you were faced with the sweetest, funniest and attractive man who literally  makes you weak in the knees when you kiss him?

You’d fall hard. Thats what you would do. You’d fall hard too.

Fuck I’m too old for this shit!

Mexican Fiesta – Day 18


Landed up cancelling dinner plans and A and I had a little Mexican fiesta by ourselves at home and got to bed by 9 🙂 was perfect. We made quesidellas with all the yummy salsa, sour cream and guacamole 🙂

In other news I think I have a Urinary Tract Infection? Oh my god the level of the stomach aches I was dealing with today are insane. Lower abdomen pain and I need to pee all the time – at least I feel I do.

I knew all this sex was going to catch up to us eventually!

Special – Day 14


What makes everything so special with A is the immense amount of trust I feel when I am with him. The way he makes me feel so safe, as if no harm will ever come near me when I am with him. It was already 2 months ago that we tried for the first time and after having a few cocktails, going down on him in the car on our way home, it felt like it was time to try again.

It was magical. It was special, he was so kind and gentle and loving, even more than our first time. We kissed slowly, he put music on and undressed me slowly, staring into each others eyes all the while. It was tight and slow and erotic but so romantic at the same time. We smiled at each other every so often, he kissed my forehead, we held hands and he whispered ‘you’re so special’ and he asked if I was ok. We looked deeply into each others eyes, I squeezed his hands and he kissed my back softly when he finished inside me. He is so special and magical and I never want to leave his side.

Cant wait for 13:20 – Day 9


A arrives at the airport at 13:20 and I cannot wait!

I am so excited to see him I can hardly contain myself – we’ve been sending dirty texts for like the past three days already lol. And we are so glad this break is over – we are never going away without each other again! It was the absolute worst.

So excited I can hardly contain myself!

the best – Day 16



Are you waving or are you cresting? I did mushrooms for the first time ever on Friday night all the way through to Saturday morning and it was incredible!Like seriously on of the most fun nights of my life. I did them with A and a bunch of his friends and it was fabulous.


What was the best though was lying in the tent with A chatting for four hours because we couldn’t sleep. We spoke about so many things – our childhoods, our dreams, our relationship.

And we just lay chatting and kissing and making out like teenagers – it was so special. Being in his arms and just chatting and kissing passionately.

I’m too old for this shit – Day 10 

A’s mother knocked on the door while we were having sex and then we obviously stopped and jumped under the covers and then she came in. Fucking awkward…
I have never had a problem with the fact that he lives with his parents. My friends have asked me if I don’t find it strange because every time I go there I spend some time with his parents. Then I’m sleeping in his room and it’s like his parents know what we doing. It didn’t bother me. 
But this morning…
It was strange, I shouldn’t feel awkward.

I’ve never done this. I went to boarding school at the age of 6, then in university I lived alone and then I lived with my husband. I never dated a guy who lived with his parents and if he did then we spent most time at my house. This is new pretty much and so I guess I don’t know how to feel about it. 

I guess I just feel that it would be nice to be alone with him…

The bride, The divorcee and the Single mom – Day 14


My best friends mini bachelorette party. We had a mini party as the one will all the guests will be held shortly before the wedding.

Bachelorette parties are meant to be wild and make you feel young and free.

Well the three of us went out to dinner and discussed serious matters such as marriage, divorce and children as well as what we want from our careers and from our partners and from life. Shit got real haha. At the age of 26, one of us is getting married, I have been divorced and my other best friend has been a single mom for 5 years already.  This is honestly not where I thought we would be at this stage in our lives, but I wouldn’t change a thing.

The wine was flowing and after dinner we went to a bar and the shots started flowing! Thats where the chaos started and we were reminded that we were not eighteen anymore because the hangover this morning is no joke

Good times were had by all 🙂

Straight out of the army – Day 24 

I went to visit a friend at her kibbutz. We all had a great time drinking a little and smoking a little. 

I met this guy D and his friend E and we hung out. 

They both 22 and fresh out of the army and working at a kibbutz for 6 months. I really hit it off with them, really nice guys. 

From the start it was clear that D and I were interested in each other and we really connected and I landed up spending the night. He was so sweet, saying how it felt so good to be wanted, how he isn’t usually the guy that gets the girl – which I found strange because he is gorgeous and super sweet. We made love and it was really amazing, innocent and sweet and there were times when he said ‘this is new’ which was sweet. When we woke up in the morning it was as if he completely warmed up to me and felt comfortable and he came out of his shell and took control and it was hot and rough and great. 

He went to work in the morning, I slept late and when I woke up I hung out with E. We chatted and we really connected and we flirted. He kept touching my leg, I purposely lay on my stomach when we were laying outside chatting so that he could look at the curves of my back and he lay his head on my calves and then my thighs. ‘Are you movin up and next thing you’ll be lying on my bum?’ I asked. And he said that was his plan. He picked me up and carried me to his room and we had sex and half way through it – I just stopped him and said I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t make love to his best friend and hours later with him right next door. 

I left. He walked me out and we hugged and kissed. 

On a different day I would have loved to be with him. He made me feel vulnerable. But on the same day as his best friend. I couldn’t do it.