Today I went to Rosh Hanikra and Akko, and it was absolutely magnificent.
The crystal clear water, the sounds of the waves on the grottos rocks and the chirping of the fruit bats hiding.
These moments when my heart and my soul are smiling, these are the moments that I wish I could freeze these moments. Where all the anxiety calms and the intrusive thoughts are silent.
Ok so C is slightly agitated because I won’t let him even touch me, literally all we do is kiss.
I have made it quite clear that I am not going to sleep with him. So I have been told I can’t sleep in his bed anymore hahaha. This is hilarious. He also all of a sudden doesn’t want to go camping with me anymore. Strange.
So this morning I left early and I went exploring around and spent some time on the beach reading and writing and drinking tea.
I have a little bit of anxiety.
My throat is sore and I have a cold. When I get sick I get really sad and really down.
Skyped with Andrew this evening for two hours, it was lovely.
Maybe it’s because I am sick or maybe it’s because I am now in Israel and I was expecting to have an epiphany and I haven’t that I’m feeling incredibly anxious and sad.
Last night I kissed the Boy from Canada, and shared his bed. No I didn’t sleep with him. We only kissed.
Usually I would be more open to this but I am feeling incredibly reserved which made me realized I have fallen for Andrew.
So C (guy from Canada) took me out to breakfast as I had no money haha and then we went for a lovely long walk on the beach. We kissed and we held hands. It was incredible.
He is really lovely and we get along well, much like old friends, like we have known each other in past lives or a parallel universe.
Around 4pm a miracle happened!
The taxi driver from the previous night rocked up at reception with my purse! And my passport!
I am so relieved.
I have the flu which isn’t ideal. So I am going to bed at 7pm!
The view is stunning.
We take long walks on the beach and share ice cream.
We cook dinner over a glass of wine.
He sleeps soundly on the couch.
We stare into each others.
We hold hands and kiss and explore.
Slight anxiety because I never want this holiday to end.
I want to stay locked in the haze with him.