the best – Day 16

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Shrooms

Are you waving or are you cresting? I did mushrooms for the first time ever on Friday night all the way through to Saturday morning and it was incredible!Like seriously on of the most fun nights of my life. I did them with A and a bunch of his friends and it was fabulous.

Love

What was the best though was lying in the tent with A chatting for four hours because we couldn’t sleep. We spoke about so many things – our childhoods, our dreams, our relationship.

And we just lay chatting and kissing and making out like teenagers – it was so special. Being in his arms and just chatting and kissing passionately.

Minefield on your left, Minefield on your right, best go straight – Day 4

I did it!

I slept on the Northern side of the Jordan river 🙂 it was so amazing to be back in my tent. I loved every second of it.

I hiked the Gilabon and along the Jordan river. The Gilabon was my favorite, it was absolutely magnificent. There was a section that was a meter wide and on each side there was barbwire with signs saying minefields, with small tunnels that were covered with grass and you had crawl underneath.

I am scratched and bruised all over my legs.

I forgot my fork, so I ate my dinner with the edge of my toothpaste tube hahahaha.

In nature.

It’s where I belong and it’s where I am happiest.

Who knew.

I have always been a city girl, I love make up and I love doing my hair. I love fine wine and painting my nails and dressing up.

But boy does it feel good to be in a war zone, scratches on my legs, cheeks blood red, hair filthy and carrying 10kilograms on my back…

Easy come and easy go – Day 15

  
Two guys that I met here at the hostel that are volunteering with me leave tomorrow! 

So we did a quick hike this morning and now baking a farewell cake 😊 

You meet so many amazing people along the way, saying good bye is always strange. You form such quick connections and make memories that will last a life time. Then all to say good bye to someone you most likely will never see again. 

The rains have come early they say – Day 11

  
Omg! 

Ok so drenched. I got drenched this morning. Soaking wet, backpack soaked, hair, underwear everything. 

Made it to Ein GeV and its Shabbat so most places are closed but there was thankfully a tiny store that sells olive products open – Olea Essence – they incredible. Check them out. 

They made me coffee, took me and refused to let me go! Fed me the most delicious lunch and I spent the day with a lovely lady and two guys. Israel is filled with such beautiful souls. They arranged for me to stay at a hostel – as I have no money, I am going to volunteer at the hostel for three weeks then I get to sleep and eat for free lol. 

We sped down the highway listening to ‘smooth operator’ with the rain pouring down. 

I have a bed, four walls and new friends. I had to buy clothes from the second hand shop because I left most of my things back in Tel Aviv and only have the essentials in my backpack for camping. Of course my clothes are soaked as well!  

So pause for three weeks. 

When I’m done here I will continue around the sea and hike the Golan heights. 

I’m warm. I miss the silence and the hiking and the adventure. But God does it feel good to have a warm shower after 5 days and rest my head in a pillow and not my jacket! 

It is so ironic. I have always been so fortunate. Never in my life have I had to take the cheapest room in a hotel! And now I have to work just to get a bed to sleep in…

By the way, Ed is chatting loudly! 

Rest day – Day 10 

  
My cold is still not gone bleh! 

So I was incredibly miserable this morning! The wind was howling. The fact that my tent didn’t blow over is a miracle lol. Felt like binging like crazy! So I walked 5km’s to a gas station and had a chocolate croissant and m&m’s! So I walked 10km’s which helped with the bit of guilt I was feeling! 

Staying at my same spot tonight, spent the day writing and reading and I took a lovely long walk through the banana fields and olive trees. Made an epic lunch sandwich! 

And been snacking on cranberries whilst reading all afternoon. Feel like I have had way too many calories today! 

Which made me think, I’m in a war with my eating disorder. We fight and we fight and for years we have been fighting. What if we accept each other and call a truce? 

What if we just look each other in the eyes and say ‘it is what it is, let’s stop beating each other up’ 

Settling in – Day 9 

  
 
You walk and you walk and you walk.

I thought I would reflect and think about my ex husband, about my divorce and my current relationship. My future, what my plans are because I currently have no job. I live in a tiny room behind my uncles house. 

But I don’t contemplate these things. 

I focus on my steps and the wind and the view. My sore feet, the straps of my backpack digging into my skin, shoulders red. Where will I sleep tonight? Will I see anyone camping or will I be alone again? 

Here and now and survival. 

That’s all I think about really.

I have pitched my tent at Ha’on and I have a beautiful view of the Sea of Galilee, opposite me, across the ocean I see the city lights of Tiberius where I woke up yesterday. 

I’m settling in. I’m making pasta and I’m writing for the first time and I am feeling calm.

I am content. 

Looking forward to snuggling in my sleeping bag 😊

Set up camp 

  

 

Walked from Tiberius to Kinneret. Camping next to the Jordan river for the night. This is where Jesus was baptized – just in case. Feeling much more optimistic and courageous than yesterday and this morning. 

Took forever, but managed to set up my tent. Made myself dinner and tea. Spilled my tea all over my sleeping bag so I shall be using my towel as a blanket tonight – lord have mercy! And it’s cold. And there are loud noises – jackals. And screeching birds. And every time a twig moves I get the fright of my life. 

I have bruised my lower back because for some reason on my backpack, there is something hurting me and I can’t figure out what or what to do about it! 

I’m fucking horrified. Horrified. Just horrified.  

The boy from Canada gave me a flick knife. And I hold it constantly. Like what am I going to do – stab a jackal or human? I mean come on…

Ironically I am petrified yet having a whale of a time and feeling incredibly liberated and like I could take on the world. 

What are you trying to prove – Day 8 

 
Honestly. 

Last night I landed up staying at a hostel- that had white linen. Honestly I have never been so excited in my life. 

I have woken up and my horrendous flu is back and my head feels the size of a hot air balloon. 

I’m planning to go to Golan heights today?

I’m starting to feel like a complete fool. What am I even trying to prove here? That I am brave or strong? Or maybe that I am not a spoilt brat? Or perhaps I am trying to prove to myself that I am capable despite the odds? 

This is starting To seem like an incredibly narcissistic journey…

Like what the fuck are you trying to prove Danielle? 

Find yourself? You find yourself in the ones you love. You can’t escape the truth, and you can’t runaway from yourself. You ate you. ‘Find yourself’ is possibly the biggest load of shit I have heard in my life. I know myself. 

I love my life everyday. I am me and I sure as hell did not have to embark on this ridiculous journey to find me. Find yourself in your friends and family, find yourself in your lovers arms. Find yourself in your home and the nature that surrounds it. 

You don’t have to be alone to find yourself. 

You don’t have to set out in a moronic journey. 

I thought I was going to go back home with journals filled with stories. Having read numerous books. Well I haven’t read one book, I hardly write, I don’t sit contemplating life. 

Instead I scramble to figure out where to sleep. My shoulders and arms are in so much pain. My chest is tight and I’m coughing up insane amounts of yellow mucus. I don’t know what my next meal will be. I have like no money. I’m lugging a tent around that I haven’t used, that I don’t even know how to set up. I still waste money on binge food. I still love lipstick and I still kiss boys despite the fact that I have serious feelings for someone. 

Like seriously? 

What am I trying to prove…